-->

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Stuck In The Middle With You

When news crossed our desk yesterday evening that Rand Paul - not RON Paul, but RAND Paul, Mr. Aqua Buddha himself - is considering a run for president on the Republican ticket, we had to take a moment and shake our collective heads.

It's not that we think everything President Obama does is great. We've been critical of him more than once here, and we expect we'll be critical of him again as time goes on.

We're also not so blind as to think that Mr. Obama is politically invincible. There are some polls that say he's got a tight race ahead. Still, the only polls that will really matter are the ones the voters will head to in the autumn of 2012. If the rest of America is too busy bitching, sniping, or whining to be bothered to vote, while the only people who show up to vote are folks whose family tree resembles a telephone pole, then yes - those other polls could be right, and we could see Mr. Obama losing.

Of course, that would also require the current GOP to put up someone as a candidate for president in 2012 who has his/her dignity intact, who isn't insane, and can still garner both the nutjob vote and the quiet, sane, traditional Republican vote.

Since Ronald Reagan is long gone, and the image of him that many on the right keep trying to deify never really existed, we'd say that right now the Republican lineup for presidential candidates looks more empty than a cross-country skiing trail in Nebraska in July.

Still… there are more than a few folks on the right who appear to be feeling around for hats to throw into the ring.

We doubt Rand Paul will actually run for president in 2012, although former Minnesota governor Tim Pawlenty did kind-of announce this week. Mitt Romney is almost certain to run - although since he passed universal health care in Massachusetts when he was governor, he's certain to lose the corporatist right. And since he's still a Mormon, he'll also lose the nutjob right. So he'll never win the nomination either way.

Then there's Mike Huckabee, who has lately seemed like he's been trying hard to lose the nomination. Even conservative pundit/columnist George Will called Huckabee a "vibrator" recently - and we're certain that wasn't an accident.

We're not going to mention some of those on the right who have uttered the whispers of longing for the Presidency, like Gov. Mitch Daniels of Indiana, or former Sen. Rick Santorum from Pennsylvania. There are obvious problems with both men that will keep them from running - or winning.

If we keep looking, we run into the seriously crazy part of the Republican field of hopefuls. No one knows crazy quite like Rep. Michele Bachmann of Minnesota, and Gov. Haley Barbour of Mississippi needs to put away his white robe and pointy hat before he thinks about seriously entering the race.

We haven't even mentioned two of the biggest political washups who somehow have found ways to appear successful. One was responsible for losing Congress for the Republicans in spectacular fashion in the late 90s, and one is a half-term governor who more people in her own party hate than love, according to recent polling.

We're not saying it's impossible for the GOP to find a candidate to run against President Obama in the 2012 Presidential Race. What we will say is what we've been warning Republicans about for many years now: You will never find a candidate who will satisfy all the different fanatical factions in your base AND have that person be someone who can win over enough moderates and independents to win the general election.

If nothing else, the upcoming presidential race should be a never-ending gaffe-fest.

Vice President Biden, eat your heart out.